Thoughts on Self Care
A little over a year ago I wrote a post on becoming a hermit, on embracing solitude. It's been interesting over the last year to see how embracing solitude has changed me. Because I've been so intentional with my alone time, I've had more energy to go out and see friends and do stuffy purposefully spending time with myself, I've inadvertently found myself spending more time with other people. However, there has been a few bumps in my journey as a hermit...
Recently, I've started to realize that I've become less intentional about my time alone. I've started just coming home, plopping on the couch, eating all the carbs, and watching Nextflix. Every day. And I'm always tired. And I never want to see anyone. And I'm constantly bored. And I'm spending too much money in an effort to make myself feel good. And it's been bad for me.
When I'm not intentional with my time, when I don't use my free time to do things that I love and that make me feel good and productive, I'm miserable and I retreat into my bad habits as a "quick fix." This is detrimental to my mental health, my budget, my relationships... It's really not a good place for me to be. So, right now I'm building a plan to make sure I'm intentional with my time.
I need to use my free time to take care of myself; mind, body, soul. I need to read. I need to write. I need to create. I need to get outside when it's nice out. I need to eat delicious food that isn't just potatoes and pasta and bread. Protein and veggies are key. I know the things that make me feel healthy and happy, but when I'm tired, it's easy to fall into the habit of what's easy, what feels good right now, not what will help me feel good tomorrow or next week.
What feels good right now? Buying another candle that I don't need. Watching 12 episodes of Parks and Rec in one sitting. Eating my own body weight in mac & cheese. But then I feel sluggish and lethargic and broke. I don't want to see anyone because I just want to crawl under a rock. Next thing I know I've spent my entire savings on candles I don't need. And while it felt good in the moment, the next day when I actually need that money for something... I'm miserable.
I think I thought that if I was spending time alone to recharge, it didn't matter how I spent that time because I was taking care of myself. But there's more to it than that. If I don't spend that time doing things I love and that are nourishing to me, I'm just letting myself become lethargic. That's not being a hermit, that's being a slug.
So my promise to myself this year is not only will I spend time with myself, I will spend time with myself doing things that are nourishing and uplifting and good. I will not be a vegetable, I will eat my vegetables.
Recently, I've started to realize that I've become less intentional about my time alone. I've started just coming home, plopping on the couch, eating all the carbs, and watching Nextflix. Every day. And I'm always tired. And I never want to see anyone. And I'm constantly bored. And I'm spending too much money in an effort to make myself feel good. And it's been bad for me.
When I'm not intentional with my time, when I don't use my free time to do things that I love and that make me feel good and productive, I'm miserable and I retreat into my bad habits as a "quick fix." This is detrimental to my mental health, my budget, my relationships... It's really not a good place for me to be. So, right now I'm building a plan to make sure I'm intentional with my time.
I need to use my free time to take care of myself; mind, body, soul. I need to read. I need to write. I need to create. I need to get outside when it's nice out. I need to eat delicious food that isn't just potatoes and pasta and bread. Protein and veggies are key. I know the things that make me feel healthy and happy, but when I'm tired, it's easy to fall into the habit of what's easy, what feels good right now, not what will help me feel good tomorrow or next week.
What feels good right now? Buying another candle that I don't need. Watching 12 episodes of Parks and Rec in one sitting. Eating my own body weight in mac & cheese. But then I feel sluggish and lethargic and broke. I don't want to see anyone because I just want to crawl under a rock. Next thing I know I've spent my entire savings on candles I don't need. And while it felt good in the moment, the next day when I actually need that money for something... I'm miserable.
I think I thought that if I was spending time alone to recharge, it didn't matter how I spent that time because I was taking care of myself. But there's more to it than that. If I don't spend that time doing things I love and that are nourishing to me, I'm just letting myself become lethargic. That's not being a hermit, that's being a slug.
So my promise to myself this year is not only will I spend time with myself, I will spend time with myself doing things that are nourishing and uplifting and good. I will not be a vegetable, I will eat my vegetables.
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